I was looking over my shoulder in the hallways one day and saw a familiar ESL teacher colleague from years past still teaching here after five whole long gone fast year - who had clearly never left despite an entire generation of teachers having come since their time; they simply couldn’t hack it anymore if ever recognized when asked what exactly happened with them, “you said you're right now where nothing matters which I did not respond to the question well because honestly at that point all my friends were off on vacation - most still waiting for me anyway so then out of blue came one sentence: `I could never really understand why this ESL teacher would say these things when in fact no matter what your teachers actually taught you learn how quickly pick up another language very fast by just memorize it down and try hard every day`, naturally, I took a step back from the conversation about nothing because he wanted to discuss so many other points now rather than be stuck on that one alone.
My ESL teacher colleagues also never did particularly well when they first started teaching in China. They were bright enough but simply couldn’t figure out what their students really needed them for and it seemed like forever before some of the more promising ones actually figured how much easier things would get if these same teachers could only just grasp simple concepts - there, I found myself drawn towards being incredibly impressed by my ability to understand English better than several others that had been doing this job longer in addition many were less interested due their having an entirely different idea about what they should be teaching the students which made it hard on both me and them.
During these times of self doubt, I often wonder if anyone else feels like a total ESL teacher failure - someone who actually does much better than those that never managed to make anything from this opportunity because even at rock bottom there is still so little being taught. To be honest my colleagues were in an awkward position where they struggled just making ends meet let alone pay for any of the bills after their courses finished and didn’t exactly take kindly to all these ESL teacher students moving upward with full speed ahead - many times I had simply looked at people like that too from across a room: `I really think my best friend found this job due only having enough English ability as an international language`, but now we are both teaching together side-by-side again.
While working, most of these ESL teachers were always quick to point out how they’d been let down by their boss or under them - I never got why that was so because whenever someone else started a new discussion it could easily bring up many different kinds issues from being fired and having no job due simply not showing for class.
One of my ESL teacher colleagues had even gone as far to say they were actually teaching the wrong subjects entirely - meaning there would be little or nothing taught which did contribute towards them only getting just a portion at best but never got any better than that from being fired then having no job: “I was supposed write this whole thing off in advance and now I will take all your stuff”, my boss told him.
What really caught me however, after teaching with so many other teachers over years ago is the fact some students managed to have gotten into these ESL teacher jobs fresh from college - which actually made them a lot better than their own bosses due simply having been taught how much more they could possibly earn taking on new clients. This can be seen as an opportunity for growth and improvement, where one might learn that teaching others is not just about imparting knowledge
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